Recently I was on my way into one of the mega hospitals in Tucson to visit a sick friend. At the entrance are two sets of sliding glass doors. I was entering the outside set and could see a woman holding an infant carrier coming out through the inside set of doors. I readied my smile and words of congratulations on her little treasure. As she came closer the words died in my mouth and my smile faded when I looked into her face. It was a mask of infinite sorrow. I’m sure she didn’t even see me through the tears that threatened to overflow onto her cheeks. I glanced into the infant carrier and saw only a wadded pink blanket. My mind began clicking away at the incongruity of the baby carrier and the sad face when I saw the sign inside the lobby. This hospital is a Safe Haven newborn drop-off site. A place where an infant less than 30 days old can be left, anonymously, no questions asked. The baby is cared for, then placed into the arms of a loving family who wants it. Arizona passed the law in 2001 authorizing such safe places to avoid unwanted infants being abandoned to die.
This was a hard post to write. Understanding the difficult reality for other people takes me out of my secure, happy existence and makes me once again realize how very fortunate I am. That encounter lasted less than 30 seconds and a dark blue cloud hung over me the rest of the day and, in fact, I still feel it when the memory passes my mind. I harbor a deep sadness for the infant who was put in a Safe Baby box, instinctively aware that the mother she had been a part of for at least nine months was no longer with her. I felt empathy for the woman who made the heartbreaking decision only she could know and understand that she had to give up the child she carried inside, under her heart for nine months. I am grateful for compassionate lawmakers who sanctioned these safe places to save innocent infants, giving them an opportunity to thrive in families that want to raise a child. A mixed blessing.
wonkagranny 
A tough topic to click the Like button. Realistic is sometimes hard, but thanks for sharing.
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Thank you, Sally. Yes, I sat on this essay for over two weeks and finally felt I had to post it because I was so deeply affected. I could not get that woman’s face out of my mind. I wanted to acknowledge one of the real-life issues that I have been shielded from in my own life. Out of over 400 views of the post, you are the only “like” and “comment”, so I know it isn’t a popular subject. I’ll return to lighter topics on Wonkagranny.
I did have more comments on NextDoor, LinkedIn, and X. I think those sites expect grittier topics. Thank you so much for reading.
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We know there are all kinds of mothers in the world and now is a good time to be grateful for ours.
But let us also remember the ones who were incredibly brave enough and to love their child so much as to let another mother have a chance to love it through adoption.
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Thank you for reading Rosemary. Yes, it think it is incredibly brave also and very important to let people know that there are good solutions in troubled times. Thank you for your comment.
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Almost three years ago, my niece and her husband received a call that a newborn had been left at a local hospital and would they want to foster when he finished detox. Our family has never been the same. This precious little boy has now been adopted into our family of four generations, and he is absolutely the joy of our lives. We are so thankful that Arizona provides a safe haven for newborns, and are forever grateful to this mom who loved her baby enough to save his life.
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Beautiful telling of an emotional moment. Thank you for sharing this.
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This little boy has been loved all his life due to the love of the woman who gave him birth. He has a new family who adores him. I pray that she has peace because what she did is save her baby’s life.
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